So Monday night was Halloween, and select theatres across the US and Canada had showings of Ghostbusters. Don't be surprised if you missed out. The showings were horribly advertised. The only reason I knew about them was because I listed Ghostbusers as one of my favorite things on Facebook. Really though, if they'd done even a little bit of print or TV advertising I'm sure they'd have filled those screenings.
Ah well, let's move on.
So my friend Jeff and I were watching the movie, and it hits me, everything that The Three Musketeers (which I reviewed here) did wrong, Ghostbusters did right.
Okay, so they are both very different films. Different genres, different settings, and so on, but at their core they are both ensemble stories. They are about groups of characters fighting towards a common goal. The Musketeers want to defeat Richelieu while the Ghostbusters want to defeat Gozer. So, while the candy coating may be different, the chocolaty inside is the same. (Yes, I'm writing this right after Halloween so candy metaphors are on my mind.)
So then, why does Ghostbusters remain a classic while the current version of The Three Musketeers have only a bargain bin fate in its future? As I said before, it does everything right!
First off, the characters a likeable. Peter Venkman is an asshole, unrepentant and over the top the entire movie. He's smarmy and hits on just about anything female with a pulse. But at the same time he's likable. You can see that under his exterior he actually does care about the guys he works with, and in the end he is a hero. He also has the best lines in the entire movie, such as "Back off man, I'm a scientist!"
Bill Murray does a great job of portraying Venkman. In fact, I doubt there is another actor living right now that could pull it off if they were ever to remake Ghostbusters.
The other thing Ghostbusters has going for it is that is succeeds despite its special effects, while the Three Musketeers failed because of its effects. The question today is not if it can be done, but rather if if should be done. Ghostbutsers used the limited effects of its time to great effect, giving some really funny and creepy moments. For instance, the eggs cooking on the countertop. It's creepy and understated, and works perfectly. If that scene had been done nowadays probably the eggs would have hatch and demon chickens would have gone flying around the room. Impressive, but much less creepy and it would have altered the overall feel of the film.
The only thing that could have been improved in Ghostbusters using today's effects would be the creature scenes where the two demon dogs run around. It's obvious when they are puppets and when they are stop motion creatures. If they decide to release a thirtieth anniversary print of the film this is the only thing I'd recommend changing.
In conclusion, my friend and I had a blast watching Ghostbusters, and I hope more classic movies find their way back to the big screen for special showings. They just need to be advertised better.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Sunday, October 30, 2011
The Dork Review: The Three Musketeers
Okay, I need to start this one with a fair warning. To properly illustrate my issues with this movie will require the use of SPOILERS. So, if you don't want to read those, then look elsewhere. Otherwise, continue below.
You may have already figured out I didn't like this version of the Three Musketeers story. I have good reason for this. Not only does it fail as a Musketeer story, it fails as a flick. There was only a single likeable character in the entire movie, and that was Queen Anne. The Musketeers were jerks, D'Artagnan was an arrogant little prick, and the villains were, well, underwhelming.
Add on top of this a story riddled with anachronisms that makes a half hearted attempt at cashing in on the current steampunk trend. Okay, there isn't any steam-powered devices in the film; the creators weren't that over the top, but there is multiple airships. In fact, the ending has a whole fleet of them headed towards France.
Yes, that's right, the ending shows the beginning of an invasion. It is such a rancid piece of sequel bait it defies expectations. I wish it was worst part of the film, but no, it just endcaps this dreck.
Do you want to know the worst part? The sin this movie commits against the whole Three Musketeer mythos and every previous rendition of their story?
It has no good swordfights!
I mean, what the hell? There's only a few times the Musketeers actually pull their swords in the entire film, and so many missed opportunities. Near the end they need to travel to England to retrieve the Queen's jewels, and one of the characters states they'll need to travel back to France with every bounty hunter and assassin standing in their way. This promises a running battle back to the Palace, which would have been awesome. Instead they hijack an airship and shoot their way home.
Yes, that's right, the Musketeers shoot their way home rather than fight dashingly. Sigh.
Finally, there's one other thing that really annoyed me. I'm a fan of the Horatio Hornblower movies that came out a few years ago, and I've studied military history around the era of the Three Musketeers, so I have an idea of how many men it takes to run a cannon on a ship. The airship duel in The Three Musketeers has the Cardinal's ship with only one man per cannon! On a ship that shouldn't have any kind of manpower issues. And, they have barrels with open flames standing around everywhere! In a room filled with gunpowder and cannonballs! Again, sigh.
Really, I don't think I would have had this much of an issue with this film it it wasn't advertised as a Three Musketeer flick. If they'd taken the basic story but changed the names around or changed the era then it wouldn't have been so bad, or just gone whole hog and turn it into a complete fantasy film then that would have been okay. But to produce a sub-par Three Musketeers movie is a terrible thing to do.
If you want a film with pretty settings and great costuming, go see this. If you want a good film that's actually entertaining, go see anything else.
You may have already figured out I didn't like this version of the Three Musketeers story. I have good reason for this. Not only does it fail as a Musketeer story, it fails as a flick. There was only a single likeable character in the entire movie, and that was Queen Anne. The Musketeers were jerks, D'Artagnan was an arrogant little prick, and the villains were, well, underwhelming.
Add on top of this a story riddled with anachronisms that makes a half hearted attempt at cashing in on the current steampunk trend. Okay, there isn't any steam-powered devices in the film; the creators weren't that over the top, but there is multiple airships. In fact, the ending has a whole fleet of them headed towards France.
Yes, that's right, the ending shows the beginning of an invasion. It is such a rancid piece of sequel bait it defies expectations. I wish it was worst part of the film, but no, it just endcaps this dreck.
Do you want to know the worst part? The sin this movie commits against the whole Three Musketeer mythos and every previous rendition of their story?
It has no good swordfights!
I mean, what the hell? There's only a few times the Musketeers actually pull their swords in the entire film, and so many missed opportunities. Near the end they need to travel to England to retrieve the Queen's jewels, and one of the characters states they'll need to travel back to France with every bounty hunter and assassin standing in their way. This promises a running battle back to the Palace, which would have been awesome. Instead they hijack an airship and shoot their way home.
Yes, that's right, the Musketeers shoot their way home rather than fight dashingly. Sigh.
Finally, there's one other thing that really annoyed me. I'm a fan of the Horatio Hornblower movies that came out a few years ago, and I've studied military history around the era of the Three Musketeers, so I have an idea of how many men it takes to run a cannon on a ship. The airship duel in The Three Musketeers has the Cardinal's ship with only one man per cannon! On a ship that shouldn't have any kind of manpower issues. And, they have barrels with open flames standing around everywhere! In a room filled with gunpowder and cannonballs! Again, sigh.
Really, I don't think I would have had this much of an issue with this film it it wasn't advertised as a Three Musketeer flick. If they'd taken the basic story but changed the names around or changed the era then it wouldn't have been so bad, or just gone whole hog and turn it into a complete fantasy film then that would have been okay. But to produce a sub-par Three Musketeers movie is a terrible thing to do.
If you want a film with pretty settings and great costuming, go see this. If you want a good film that's actually entertaining, go see anything else.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
In The Middle Of Everything
That's how I feel right now. Let me explain. No, is too much, let me sum up. (Gotta love The Princess Bride)
So, I just finished revising a story that had been sent to a few markets, and turned down by every single one. Oh well, it happens. After going through it again it's a much stronger story. Too bad I can't resubmit it to the places that rejected it. However, now I think this story is strong enough to use as one of my Clarion submissions, so it's all good. And, I can always make it my submission to Writers of the Future for this quarter.
Another story has gone in for a CBC contest. We'll see what happens with that. If it comes back I'll give it another look and think of other places to submit it. It's a really short piece, so it may be easier to sell. Heck, if it sells then great, if not, I can always rework it.
Another story just got rejected so I was able to give it a once over and fix a few things. This has gone to less markets than the first story, and I've never submitted anything to Fantasy and Science Fiction, so guess where it's headed?
Another story (seeing a pattern here?) is in with Critters.org for review and critique so that I can get feedback on it. I'm really hoping this one will be my other Clarion submission piece. I feel both things I have are or could be really strong fantasy stories. That seems to be where my head is right now.
Finally, (yes there is an end to all this) the books I wanted in preparation for starting my next novel are in. My previous attempt at writing a novel, let's just say I wasn't happy with how it turned out. I learned a lot from writing it, the most important part being I can actually sustain a novel length effort, but it was several shades less awesome than I hoped it would be. The new novel I'm going to start writing combines some of my loves. It will have martial arts, magic, and a vaguely Eastern setting. Let's say, Eastern inspired and influenced but seen through a Western eye. I'm not going to use any specific Asian culture to base it on as I don't want to be disrespectful/get it completely wrong.
However, before I start writing I need to do some research and plan a bit. Right now I'm reading A Daughter of The Samurai, the story of a woman raised as Japan transitioned from the medieval period to the modern age, and it's given me some great background and setting ideas. Recently I purchased a book on Shaolin training techniques, another on Japanese architecture, and a third on Buddhist monastic life. All three of these will be fed into the wood-chipper that is my brain to pump out chopped bits of awesome.
Before I start the novel I'm going to make sure my Clarion submissions are ready, so the next few weeks I'll probably be writing less and reading a heck of a lot more.
So, I just finished revising a story that had been sent to a few markets, and turned down by every single one. Oh well, it happens. After going through it again it's a much stronger story. Too bad I can't resubmit it to the places that rejected it. However, now I think this story is strong enough to use as one of my Clarion submissions, so it's all good. And, I can always make it my submission to Writers of the Future for this quarter.
Another story has gone in for a CBC contest. We'll see what happens with that. If it comes back I'll give it another look and think of other places to submit it. It's a really short piece, so it may be easier to sell. Heck, if it sells then great, if not, I can always rework it.
Another story just got rejected so I was able to give it a once over and fix a few things. This has gone to less markets than the first story, and I've never submitted anything to Fantasy and Science Fiction, so guess where it's headed?
Another story (seeing a pattern here?) is in with Critters.org for review and critique so that I can get feedback on it. I'm really hoping this one will be my other Clarion submission piece. I feel both things I have are or could be really strong fantasy stories. That seems to be where my head is right now.
Finally, (yes there is an end to all this) the books I wanted in preparation for starting my next novel are in. My previous attempt at writing a novel, let's just say I wasn't happy with how it turned out. I learned a lot from writing it, the most important part being I can actually sustain a novel length effort, but it was several shades less awesome than I hoped it would be. The new novel I'm going to start writing combines some of my loves. It will have martial arts, magic, and a vaguely Eastern setting. Let's say, Eastern inspired and influenced but seen through a Western eye. I'm not going to use any specific Asian culture to base it on as I don't want to be disrespectful/get it completely wrong.
However, before I start writing I need to do some research and plan a bit. Right now I'm reading A Daughter of The Samurai, the story of a woman raised as Japan transitioned from the medieval period to the modern age, and it's given me some great background and setting ideas. Recently I purchased a book on Shaolin training techniques, another on Japanese architecture, and a third on Buddhist monastic life. All three of these will be fed into the wood-chipper that is my brain to pump out chopped bits of awesome.
Before I start the novel I'm going to make sure my Clarion submissions are ready, so the next few weeks I'll probably be writing less and reading a heck of a lot more.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Not Dead Just Busy
Sorry for the radio silence lately. I've been crazy busy the last few weeks between work, seeing my parents in their new place, and getting stories written and up to snuff for submission to Clarion. The workshop starts taking submissions in December and is open until March, so hopefully I'll know by Ad Astra if I'm going to Clarion next year!
Thursday, October 6, 2011
The Dork Review: Heirs of a Broken Land
So I was finally able to finish the lovely Marie Bilodeau's Heirs of a Broken Land series. Man, it's hard to squeeze in reading time at work, especially with how busy things are once September rolls around. (Yes I realize work is when I should be working, but being on a tech support phone line means downtime between calls that can be used for things other than work.)
So what did I think of this series? Very much the same as Destiny's Blood.
Marie's work has an epic scale. This series encompasses the fate of a continent split in twain by a magical barrier known as the "Wall of Loss". It has princesses, warriors, and sorceresses, and whole lot of strong women filling those roles. The fate of nations is decided by three women, each strong in her own way.
Now, I've never considered myself a feminist, but I do like to see believable female characters portrayed in fiction. None of the women in these books is a cliche. Each has her own strengths, and weaknesses, and each is given their moment to shine. The are portrayed as people as opposed to objects, and there is nary a damsel in distress to be seen. And the best part? They actually have realistic relationships instead of fairytale romances.
That isn't to say there isn't a fair bit of storytelling going on. These books were written before Destiny's Blood, but they have the same epic language that needs to be shouted out loud to obtain its full effect. The story comes to a crashing end, where a sacrifice needs to be made and the wounds of a broken land healed.
Again, my main quibble is that there isn't enough in these books. I think each of them could easily have been twice as long, as at times they do feel rushed and the passage of time is hard to keep track of. A minor quibble, and probably something more obvious to someone who reads a lot or has studied the techniques of writing.
Find out more about these books at Marie's website.
So what did I think of this series? Very much the same as Destiny's Blood.
Marie's work has an epic scale. This series encompasses the fate of a continent split in twain by a magical barrier known as the "Wall of Loss". It has princesses, warriors, and sorceresses, and whole lot of strong women filling those roles. The fate of nations is decided by three women, each strong in her own way.
Now, I've never considered myself a feminist, but I do like to see believable female characters portrayed in fiction. None of the women in these books is a cliche. Each has her own strengths, and weaknesses, and each is given their moment to shine. The are portrayed as people as opposed to objects, and there is nary a damsel in distress to be seen. And the best part? They actually have realistic relationships instead of fairytale romances.
That isn't to say there isn't a fair bit of storytelling going on. These books were written before Destiny's Blood, but they have the same epic language that needs to be shouted out loud to obtain its full effect. The story comes to a crashing end, where a sacrifice needs to be made and the wounds of a broken land healed.
Again, my main quibble is that there isn't enough in these books. I think each of them could easily have been twice as long, as at times they do feel rushed and the passage of time is hard to keep track of. A minor quibble, and probably something more obvious to someone who reads a lot or has studied the techniques of writing.
Find out more about these books at Marie's website.
Monday, September 26, 2011
Word On The Street 2011
Yesterday was Word On The Street, 2011 edition, and I had a blast! And it all started with a cookie.
Perhaps I should explain that possibly cryptic statement. My Word On The Street Sunday started the same as they have the last few years, with me running late. My original plan has always been to be there by 11AM, and it has gone awry every single year. But at least I'm learning. If I want to get there I need to be up and out the door earlier. Also, taking the train from Burlington works a heck of a lot better than driving all the way into Toronto. (I learned that the first year to my dismay.)
So, yes, cookie. I arrived at the Burlington Go station too late for the 10:10 train, so I had to take the 11:10. While I was waiting a lovely young lady, who's name was Leann, I think (we exchanged names but I might be misremembering it or misheard it) offered me a cookie from a box she'd picked up at a bakery with her friend earlier that day or weekend.
Thus started my day, being offered a tasty treat from a lovely lady. So instead of spending the trip up to Toronto with my nose buried in the newspaper I'd just purchased I ended up chatting with Leann the whole time. Now, I know for most people this doesn't sound so special, but for me it was. I've always been a shy person, with a very thick shell. The fact that I was able to come out of it long enough to have an extended conversation with someone, never-mind that it was an attractive woman, is a minor victory for myself.
And it only got better as the day went on. So, after a pleasant trip up to Toronto I made my way to Queen's Park and wandered around. I had the good fortune to find Karen Dales and Violette Malan, two very sweet persons and outstanding authors. (Okay, so far I've only read Violette's work but every time I run into Karen she tries to get me to buy a book, in a no pressure friendly way, so I'm sure I'll submit and buy one eventually.)
Again I had a chance to chat, and again it was nice how easy it was to carry on an extended conversation. Honestly, fantasy and sci-fi authors have to be the nicest people on Earth. I mean, I've run into these ladies only a few times each yet I feel completely comfortable around them. As we talked I even mentioned that I was looking to apply to the Clarion Writers Workshop and they were both very encouraging and wished me success in getting in. Really, really nice people.
After I finished my wandering I ducked into the Wordshop tent. I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but it's put on every year I've been to Word On The Street by the Humber College of Writing. There are some interesting lectures, but the highlight of the day is when they read out first pages submitted by the audience throughout the day, give feedback, and state whether they'd continue reading past the first page. One of the hardest things to do is to get an editor to read past the first page. And my page got read! And they said they'd read past the first page!
Validation is nice and all, but what really helped was the feedback Kim Moritsugu, a teacher at Humber, provided. This is all done anonymously, so no one knew it was from me, so the comments Kim and her fellow panelist Jack David made were without bias and honest.
All things considered, Word On The Street 2011 was a great day for me. I got some cool books, chatted with some cool people, and got a healthy ego boost (don't worry, my head hasn't gotten so big it won't fit through the door). I can't wait for next year.
Perhaps I should explain that possibly cryptic statement. My Word On The Street Sunday started the same as they have the last few years, with me running late. My original plan has always been to be there by 11AM, and it has gone awry every single year. But at least I'm learning. If I want to get there I need to be up and out the door earlier. Also, taking the train from Burlington works a heck of a lot better than driving all the way into Toronto. (I learned that the first year to my dismay.)
So, yes, cookie. I arrived at the Burlington Go station too late for the 10:10 train, so I had to take the 11:10. While I was waiting a lovely young lady, who's name was Leann, I think (we exchanged names but I might be misremembering it or misheard it) offered me a cookie from a box she'd picked up at a bakery with her friend earlier that day or weekend.
Thus started my day, being offered a tasty treat from a lovely lady. So instead of spending the trip up to Toronto with my nose buried in the newspaper I'd just purchased I ended up chatting with Leann the whole time. Now, I know for most people this doesn't sound so special, but for me it was. I've always been a shy person, with a very thick shell. The fact that I was able to come out of it long enough to have an extended conversation with someone, never-mind that it was an attractive woman, is a minor victory for myself.
And it only got better as the day went on. So, after a pleasant trip up to Toronto I made my way to Queen's Park and wandered around. I had the good fortune to find Karen Dales and Violette Malan, two very sweet persons and outstanding authors. (Okay, so far I've only read Violette's work but every time I run into Karen she tries to get me to buy a book, in a no pressure friendly way, so I'm sure I'll submit and buy one eventually.)
Again I had a chance to chat, and again it was nice how easy it was to carry on an extended conversation. Honestly, fantasy and sci-fi authors have to be the nicest people on Earth. I mean, I've run into these ladies only a few times each yet I feel completely comfortable around them. As we talked I even mentioned that I was looking to apply to the Clarion Writers Workshop and they were both very encouraging and wished me success in getting in. Really, really nice people.
After I finished my wandering I ducked into the Wordshop tent. I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but it's put on every year I've been to Word On The Street by the Humber College of Writing. There are some interesting lectures, but the highlight of the day is when they read out first pages submitted by the audience throughout the day, give feedback, and state whether they'd continue reading past the first page. One of the hardest things to do is to get an editor to read past the first page. And my page got read! And they said they'd read past the first page!
Validation is nice and all, but what really helped was the feedback Kim Moritsugu, a teacher at Humber, provided. This is all done anonymously, so no one knew it was from me, so the comments Kim and her fellow panelist Jack David made were without bias and honest.
All things considered, Word On The Street 2011 was a great day for me. I got some cool books, chatted with some cool people, and got a healthy ego boost (don't worry, my head hasn't gotten so big it won't fit through the door). I can't wait for next year.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Two Years Already?
Wow, it's been two years since I started this blog. Two years since I started getting serious about my writing. Two years since I've said to myself, I'm gonna do this.
So where am I now?
Well, first off, I'm still unpublished. I wish I could say that this surprises me, but I knew from the beginning that it would be a long hard road before anything of mine actually hit print. Also, I knew then that my writing was nowhere near the quality it needed to be, but I've kept working at it and I have seen an improvement.
So how do I know I've improved? Two things; feedback and rejections. Okay, I start with the rejections idea since that's probably got people scratching their heads. One of my major accomplishments was to start submitting my stories for publication, rather than just writing them and saying "Gee, it would be nice to get published." None of them have been, but I've started noticing a change in the rejection letters I've received. The last few have provided feedback, rather than just stating "This isn't for us". Yes, it's still a rejection, but anything that helps me grow as a writer is to be cherished.
Now, about the feedback. Two things I've done to get this. First, I joined critters.org, a critiquing site where I provide critiques for others and they give me feedback on my work. It's helped a lot, both to pump me up when I get some positive comments about my work, and when weak areas are pointed out. Second, I've joined/help start a small writing group. So far there are only three of us, spread out over a large geographic area, but it's a beginning, and any and all feedback from fellow writers helps.
Aside from my writing, I've started going to conventions and meeting people (and picking up some great books I'd have otherwise missed on the way). In some ways this has opened my eyes to how the publishing industry works, especially when it comes to science fiction and fantasy. I've made a few new friends, and I hope I've presented myself in a positive light so that if and when I do get published I'll have a good reputation so that people will want to recommend my work. Of course, whatever I write has to be good enough to deserve the recommendation, but I find it's more likely to happen if people remember you fondly rather than thinking you're a dick.
Oh, and on a more personal note, I've been going to a gym for a full year now. This is the first place I've actually been able to do that. Most times, I'll go to a gym for a few months, get frustrated, quit, or start going infrequently. For the past year I've been going steadily, missing only the odd day for whatever reason.
So what now. Well, there is this CBC Radio short story contest I've just started working on a story for, and hopefully there will be an announcement on a new Tesseracts collection soon. So, onward and upward.
So where am I now?
Well, first off, I'm still unpublished. I wish I could say that this surprises me, but I knew from the beginning that it would be a long hard road before anything of mine actually hit print. Also, I knew then that my writing was nowhere near the quality it needed to be, but I've kept working at it and I have seen an improvement.
So how do I know I've improved? Two things; feedback and rejections. Okay, I start with the rejections idea since that's probably got people scratching their heads. One of my major accomplishments was to start submitting my stories for publication, rather than just writing them and saying "Gee, it would be nice to get published." None of them have been, but I've started noticing a change in the rejection letters I've received. The last few have provided feedback, rather than just stating "This isn't for us". Yes, it's still a rejection, but anything that helps me grow as a writer is to be cherished.
Now, about the feedback. Two things I've done to get this. First, I joined critters.org, a critiquing site where I provide critiques for others and they give me feedback on my work. It's helped a lot, both to pump me up when I get some positive comments about my work, and when weak areas are pointed out. Second, I've joined/help start a small writing group. So far there are only three of us, spread out over a large geographic area, but it's a beginning, and any and all feedback from fellow writers helps.
Aside from my writing, I've started going to conventions and meeting people (and picking up some great books I'd have otherwise missed on the way). In some ways this has opened my eyes to how the publishing industry works, especially when it comes to science fiction and fantasy. I've made a few new friends, and I hope I've presented myself in a positive light so that if and when I do get published I'll have a good reputation so that people will want to recommend my work. Of course, whatever I write has to be good enough to deserve the recommendation, but I find it's more likely to happen if people remember you fondly rather than thinking you're a dick.
Oh, and on a more personal note, I've been going to a gym for a full year now. This is the first place I've actually been able to do that. Most times, I'll go to a gym for a few months, get frustrated, quit, or start going infrequently. For the past year I've been going steadily, missing only the odd day for whatever reason.
So what now. Well, there is this CBC Radio short story contest I've just started working on a story for, and hopefully there will be an announcement on a new Tesseracts collection soon. So, onward and upward.
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